The Jig is Up!

"The problem is all inside your hard drive", she said to me
The answer is easy if you take it logically
I'd like to help you in your struggle to be techie
There must be fifty ways to please your high-tech lover...”

"The problem is all inside your hard drive", she said to me
The answer is easy if you take it logically
I'd like to help you in your struggle to be techie
There must be fifty ways to please your high-tech lover...”

1. Starting from the ground up, please practice safe-tech: make sure all your house wiring is properly earthed. If you don’t know what that is, consult your electrician.
2. Use 3-pin power strips from your 3-pin wall socket to your high-tech equipment, and for anything else in-between.
3. Make sure your power strips have surge-protection, of some kind.
4. For inverter use, make sure your battery amperages match the inverter/UPS unit for longer life and better charging.
5. Don’t overload a single power strip with too much tech equipment; buy more power strips or use multiple wall outlets for your home / office gadget menagerie.
6. Never plug your high-tech into outlets when your gadget’s power switches are on.
7. Don’t wear your iPod in the shower!
8. Buy water-resistant covers and bags for your laptop, phone, and pocket camera.

“She said it's really not my habit to intrude
Furthermore, I hope my meaning won't be lost or misconstrued
But I'll repeat myself, at the risk of being crude
There must be forty more ways to please your high-tech lover...”

“She said it's really not my habit to intrude
Furthermore, I hope my meaning won't be lost or misconstrued
But I'll repeat myself, at the risk of being crude
There must be forty more ways to please your high-tech lover...”

9. When you get a new smartphone, get the protective film for the screen as well.
10. Avoid cable-mania, and tie cables neatly with markings on either end as to what they plug into.
11. Avoid getting a virus by updating your protection everyday.
12. Keep all your software up-to-date using any auto-update feature available.
13. Subscribe to unlimited 24-hour Internet service - if just for the two reasons above (#11 & #12).
14. Buy an external hard drive for each laptop and desktop that you own; then make regular backups of everything (that’s called cloning).
15. Be super-safe, and make backups of your backups and keep one copy at mom’s house in case of catastrophic disaster.
16. Sync and backup your smartphone too – everyday!
17. Use free online “cloud” services like Google to save your vitals (emails, address book, calendar, etc.)
18. Keep copies of precious photos and videos online using services like Picasso, Flickr, YouTube, and Vimeo.

“You just slip out the back, Jack
Make a new plan, Stan
You don't need to be coy, Roy
Just get yourself free”

“You just slip out the back, Jack
Make a new plan, Stan
You don't need to be coy, Roy
Just get yourself free”

19. But protect your identity online by limiting access to personal information to just “friends” when using Facebook or other social networking services.
20. Generate and protect all your passwords using a software app like 1Password or LastPass.
21. Take advantage of the many free services online like SendThisFile (for sending large files to others), EmailTheWeb (for sending web pages you like to others), and DownThemAll (for faster downloads).
22. Always use the 15 or 30-day free trials before purchasing software, just to make sure that application is right for you.
23. If on a budget, read newspapers, magazines, and get books online for free (Republica, NYT, Mother Jones, etc.)
24. Type www.google.com/ig and setup your own iGoogle page for news feeds, daily cartoons, and much more delivered direct to your virtual front door.
25. Use sites like Tucows, Brothersoft, and FreewareOSX to find applications that don’t cost a rupee, and that have user reviews and ratings.
26. Use Apple iTunes software even if you don’t have an iPod or iPhone – or credit card – as iTunes is a great source for finding out what’s hot in the entertainment world, and is where you can read reviews from listeners, readers, and users. (Ps. works on both PCs and Macs.)
27. If you do have an iPod or iPhone, try out the hundreds of thousands of FREE apps and FREE music and video downloads found in iTunes.

“Hop on the bus, Gus
You don't need to discuss much
Just drop off the pen drive, Lee
And get yourself free”

“Hop on the bus, Gus
You don't need to discuss much
Just drop off the pen drive, Lee
And get yourself free”

28. Try Open Source software (www.osalt.com) before purchasing expensive commercial software – OpenOffice vs. Microsoft Office or Gimp vs. Adobe Photoshop are two no cost alternatives.
29. Subscribe to a few of the thousands of free podcasts (audio and video publications) ranging from such topics as improving your sex life or how to improve your tech life.
30. Instead of buying video games, try FOG (www.freeonlinegames.com) to play with others in such heated battles as “Obama vs. Zombies”.
31. If you find that you or your child is spending too much time online vs. time spent in the real world, try a program like EZTimer (www.internettimer.net) to control your families Internet habits.
32. If you spend a lot of time in the outdoor kitchen, try a different type of timer, made just for your smart phone and for those that like to barbeque: the Weber OnTheGrill App (www.weber.com/onthegrill) will keep you from burning that next wild boar!
33. And if it’s your lover you want to keep hot, try the Pocket Salsa phone app (www.addicted2salsa.com) to brush up on your moves before heading out for a romantic dinner and dance.
34. And later, if you are struggling to get home after that hot night out (and loadshedding has kicked in) then boot up Flashlight+ (www.moreblusky.com) for your iPhone4,as it turns the camera flash into a super strong LED torchlight.
35. If fumbling around is not your style, then you have to get Apple’s new wireless track pad for desktops and laptops (USD $69) – you will never go back to using a wonky old mouse again!

“She said it grieves me so to see you in such pain
I wish there was something I could do to make you smile again
I said I appreciate that and would you please explain
About 10 more ways...”

“She said it grieves me so to see you in such pain
I wish there was something I could do to make you smile again
I said I appreciate that and would you please explain
About 10 more ways...”

36. But if you must use a mouse, there is really only one crystal-clear choice, the new Apple wireless Magic Mouse, also USD $69.
37. And why not go all the “wireless way” with either a Jabra BT3100 dog-tag style Bluetooth stereo earpods, or the Sennheiser RS-120 Wireless Headphones set, with wireless sound soothing for any audiophile – also USD $69 or so each.
38. And if ordering anything online these days, you have to use the ordering system @ Harilo.com, as you can now pay for anything found online from USA websites, and have those wares delivered to your home in KTM – for just a small shipping surcharge!
39. But if you are in the market for a newfangled tablet, like the iPad, hold off just a few months before ordering...the new iPad II is expected out in March 2011, along with a slew of other Android 2.3+ tablets that beat the pants off anything currently on the market.
40. If you can’t wait until iPad II hits the streets, then check out the 7-inch ZTE Light Android tablet now available in Nepal (but personally, I’m holding out for the newer iPad).
41. If private web browsing is a desire, then download Apple’s free Safari for the easiest-to-use private web browsing feature: just one click turns it on and off when needed.
42. And if you are moving from place to place while on the web, and using different machines to surf, use either Firefox Sync or Google Chrome Sync to take all your bookmarks, history, and passwords with you.
43. To share your favorite webpages with friends on Facebook, follow the instructions here: http://www.facebook.com/share_options.php and you will be letting all your pals know what you know.
44. And more importantly while using Facebook, make sure the new FB sprivacy settings are setup in a way that makes sense to you: http://www.facebook.com/share_options.php#!/settings/?tab=privacy
45. If you have a small business in Nepal, don’t forget to try Facebook Ads, as they are targeted for Nepali users, with selectable demographics (boys vs. girls for example).
46. Whether you are a business or home user, when things go wrong with your high-tech equipment, don’t forget that Neoteric Nepal, one of Nepal’s biggest distributers of tech-related stuff, has the F1 Service Center located on Teku – highly recommended for all repairs!
47. For do-it-your-selfers, there is no better online resource for technical tips on hardware and software then iTunes U (inside of the iTunes software), where all the tips are free and easy to find and download.
48. And don’t forget use a routine maintenance app like CleanApp (for Mac) or CCleaner (for PC) to keep those desktops, laptops, and netbooks running smoothly.
49. If your system get’s totally hosed, try Windows System Restore (PCs) or Disk Warrior (Macs) before reaching for your backup drive.
50. Lastly, to keep your high tech lover happy, have them check out the Gadget section in every ECS Friday edition, to stay up to date with the latest in tech.

“She said why don't we both just sleep on it tonight
And I believe in the morning you'll begin to see the light
And then she kissed me and I realized she probably was right
These are the fifty ways to please your high-tech lover.”

“She said why don't we both just sleep on it tonight
And I believe in the morning you'll begin to see the light
And then she kissed me and I realized she probably was right
These are the fifty ways to please your high-tech lover.”